Janice Litman - Lilly Friend Project

Preliminary Questions

Do you live within a thirty-minute radius/are you comfortable commuting to Murray Hill or elsewhere in Manhattan to hang out with me?

[REDACTED]

Are you crazy?

Yes No

Once I review your application, I will reach out to have a more formal, sit-down interview to be my friend in Manhattan. This interview will be videotaped and I will be posting the footage on social media. Are you able to report to Manhattan and spend at least an hour for the interview?

Yes No

Open Questions

Why are you filling out this questionnaire?

To meet cool people so I can live out my NYC fantasy of having a close friend group that explores the city together

How many "close friends" (by close friends I mean people that you see more than twice a month if they live in the tri-state area or if they are a long-distance friend that you speak with at least twice a month) do you have?

Long distance friends: 12 (including my parents)Close friends in NYC: 4

Do you listen to Billie Eilish? If so, why?

She's not on any of my playlists but I'm not mad when I hear her on the radio. I really like her song "happier than ever."

It's Saturday morning! What time are you up and what do you want to do with the day?

I'm always up by 8am because my body loves a routine (even when I go out the night before). My ideal Saturday involves laying out in the sun, having a picnic, going for a swim, making crepes, and then dancing in the evening with friends.

Have you ever had an existential crisis? How did it come about and what was your ultimate takeaway from it?

My most recent existential crisis was last month when I realized that I'm only going to see my parents a couple times this year since they live in North Dakota. I recently felt very guilty about leaving them (which is kinda odd since I haven't lived on the same continent as them for the past four years) so I considered moving back there or having them move to me. But then I realized that I can't rearrange my life for them and I have to build one on my own- it's kinda a sad takeaway but it did help me move on.

You are at a party and a topic comes up that you could go on and on and on about that nobody else knows anything about. What is the topic and would you talk about it or not talk about it?

The topic is why friends are the meaning of life and how our society is doing us an injustice by emphasizing romantic relationships over platonic ones. I would briefly bring it up but not talk anyone's ear off.

What do you think about feminism? How did you come to that conclusion?

I think feminism is essential in a healthy society. I also think it is impossible as long as patriarchal values and leaders maintain their dominance over our institutions. I've come through that conclusion through books, classes, and my lived experiences.

If there was an alternate reality in which you had a debilitating, life-altering addiction, what would you be addicted to?

I would be addicted to reading romance books- but to be honest, this reality is only a few degrees off from this one.

What are your dreams?

I want to sail around south america and see the stars reflected in the ocean, witness a total solar eclipse, write a book, see tame impala in concert, and raise kids at the same time as my sister so we can do it together.

Do you believe in ethical consumerism or is it a drop in a giant well that has already been dug by multinational corporations so it doesn't matter?

I believe everyones actions matter and it's a lie that our individual actions have no impact on the planet. It all compounds and we have a duty to be ethical with our consumption, not for future generations but for our ecosystems now. I hate when people think the only argument for sustainability is "do it so your kids can have a better life" because animals and habitats are already suffering in this moment.

Multiple-Choice Questions

What qualities are most important to you in a friend

Loyalty Honesty Humor Inspiration A and B C and D

What is the worst thing on this list

Processed sugar Stubbing your toe Throwing up Your mom(or another parental type figure) telling an old embarrassing story in front of new people Realizing you were scammed out of $30

Work is:

A means to an ends A way I bring my passions to life Something I do to better society A total bummer A myth that allows rich people to steal from poor people

Which poet's writing do you most connect with?

Sylvia Plath Rumi Rupi Kaur Rainer Maria Rilke Pablo Neruda

Do you feel like you've lived one life or lots of lives?

Lots of lives Once life I don't think about it like that I don't feel like I am living I am too busy living to think about it

How do you feel about answering all these questions:

Annoyed Intrigued Resentful Inspiration Excited to meet in person Neutral

Aristotle once said; "my friends, there are no friends." How do you feel about that:

Agree Disagree Neutral That's so cold and unfeeling! Form is emptiness, emptiness is form. Emptiness is not other than form. Form is not other than emptiness

Essay Question

Please describe a friend breakup you have gone through. If you haven't gone through a friend breakup, please explain why you think you have never gone through a friend breakup. Outline a major friendship in your life and explain why it is successful.

I have never experienced a major friendship breakup for three reasons: 1. I am incredibly fortunate when it comes to the people in my life 2. I have a strong sense of if a person is worth my time or not (so I only get into friendships with people who are "worth it") and 3. I have never had a serious romantic relationship so I've been able to invest all of my time on building solid friendships. One major friendship in my life is with my college best friend, [REDACTED]. I met [REDACTED]at orientation, the first day of our freshman year. We laughed so hard that I got a stomach ache from being with her. After our freshman year, we lived together for the rest of our college years. We did everything together and we took care of each other and she's like a second sister now. She still lives in Spain (where we both went to college) so we are currently doing long-distance but it's not that hard with her because we text and call each other multiple times a day. Our friendship is so successful because we love each other unconditionally. We have gone through incredibly tough situations together and see each other at our worst. We accept each other and so we are able to be relaxed and honest around the other person.