Susan Bunch - Lilly Friend Project

Preliminary Questions

Do you live within a thirty-minute radius/are you comfortable commuting to Murray Hill or elsewhere in Manhattan to hang out with me?

[REDACTED]

Are you crazy?

Yes No

Can you supply a personal website or social media profile?

[REDACTED]

Once I review your application, I will reach out to have a more formal, sit-down interview to be my friend in Manhattan. This interview will be videotaped and I will be posting the footage on social media. Are you able to report to Manhattan and spend at least an hour for the interview?

Yes No

Open Questions

Why are you filling out this questionnaire?

I have no friend and would like to socially ‘put myself out there.’

Do you listen to Billie Eilish? If so, why?

No but I like her style!

It's Saturday morning! What time are you up and what do you want to do with the day?

Anywhere between 6:30 am and I want to do all the self care things: gym, wash hair, meal prep, etc. Then I’m probably writing, taking a long walk, or catching up with relatives. Oh and I’ll probably enjoy take out and wine!

Have you ever had an existential crisis? How did it come about and what was your ultimate takeaway from it?

Oh hell yea. It happened in late 2018 when I unraveled after breaking up with an ugly guy that I wanted to marry. I thought ‘shit if he won’t even date me, who will?’ I felt very alone and looked at a bunch of relationships in my life, realizing how surface they were. No one knew me; I didn’t even know myself. And ultimately I refocused on me, embarking on a personal and professional growth journey. I now worry about making sure I’m great to myself and letting my desperate air fade. I want to attract well and happy people, and that starts by me being in a good state.

You are at a party and a topic comes up that you could go on and on and on about that nobody else knows anything about. What is the topic and would you talk about it or not talk about it?

Technical writing! No one ever knows what it is and I’d love to explain (briefly) what it is. But I def don’t want to bore people. I’m great at reading a room.

What do you think about feminism? How did you come to that conclusion?

It’s important and layered and I feel everyone should find the ideals and values within the movement that most resonate with them. I don’t think I’ve read enough feminist literature to consider myself one (just read Sister Outsider by Audrey Lorde), but I know that I want all women to have autonomy over their bodies. I came to this conclusion because from young I knew I was queer. I didn’t have many guys crushing on me and my mom hated me cuz im fat. I knew my understanding and definition of being a woman would not fit traditional ideals. But I celebrate myself as a woman. And there’s so many types of women and femmes who shouldn’t be oppressed because of who they inherently are.

If there was an alternate reality in which you had a debilitating, life-altering addiction, what would you be addicted to?

Probably gambling, which is why I’ll never do it.

What are your dreams?

To be rich and working remotely, while creating on the side, and being surrounded by community. And speaking French everyday!

Do you believe in ethical consumerism or is it a drop in a giant well that has already been dug by multinational corporations so it doesn't matter?

Look, I’m still using Amazon! But the effort is important.

Multiple-Choice Questions

What qualities are most important to you in a friend

Loyalty Honesty Humor Inspiration A and B C and D

What is the worst thing on this list

Processed sugar Stubbing your toe Throwing up Your mom(or another parental type figure) telling an old embarrassing story in front of new people Realizing you were scammed out of $30

Work is:

A means to an ends A way I bring my passions to life Something I do to better society A total bummer A myth that allows rich people to steal from poor people

Which poet's writing do you most connect with?

Sylvia Plath Rumi Rupi Kaur Rainer Maria Rilke Pablo Neruda

Do you feel like you've lived one life or lots of lives?

Lots of lives Once life I don't think about it like that I don't feel like I am living I am too busy living to think about it

How do you feel about answering all these questions:

Annoyed Intrigued Resentful Inspiration Excited to meet in person Neutral

Aristotle once said; "my friends, there are no friends." How do you feel about that:

Agree Disagree Neutral That's so cold and unfeeling! Form is emptiness, emptiness is form. Emptiness is not other than form. Form is not other than emptiness

Essay Question

Please describe a friend breakup you have gone through. If you haven't gone through a friend breakup, please explain why you think you have never gone through a friend breakup. Outline a major friendship in your life and explain why it is successful.

My childhood best friend and I had a silent breakup. We knew each other since 4th grade and stayed in each other’s lives until college. I noticed her constantly hanging up on me, not really listening to me, and bringing em around her new friends who were always throwing me shade. This is someone who’s literally been in my life everyday, whether we spoke on the phone for hours, saw each other in class, youth group, and hangouts at each others homes.

It hurt to see her treat me weirdly. I wondered if she was ever my friend at all. I spoke to my mom about us falling apart and she said “your grandpa always noticed her following behind your older brother, and he wondered if she was actually my friend or just had the hots for my older brother.” I realized this was true.

After her first breakup, she called my brother about it first. At this point I already knew the friendship was over. She made some weak attempts to reconnect, and once we met up in person, she began ignoring my texts immediately afterwards. I literally cried over this friendship and hated that she basically used me.

I really don’t have friend atm but a major friendship is someone I met through organizing. She invited me to all her bungalow parties and that’s when we joke and catch up. I think distance makes the heart grow fonder. She lost a friend and we were supposed to have a beach date, 1-1, but it never happened. But she’s someone I’d consider a friend and has been good to me, but we see each other occasionally.