In November 2023, Lilly had an idea that she couldn’t un-have. In February 2023, she put up 400 flyers around New York City asking strangers to apply to be her friend.
The flyers said “Do you want to make a new friend?” and directed people to a website with a questionnaire. Seventy people filled it out. Lilly interviewed 24 of them.
The Process
Lilly walked through all five boroughs placing flyers in various locations. The questionnaire had 40 questions, starting simple and becoming more personal. She required respondents to provide social media links for safety verification.
She conducted filmed interviews in a borrowed therapist’s office. A friend was present during each interview. The first interview happened in a hallway because they couldn’t access the office building.
The Interviews
People talked about loneliness, friendship, belonging, and connection. They discussed moving to new places, building communities, relationship endings, and what it means to be an outsider.
One person said they filled out the questionnaire because Lilly seemed desperate. When asked in person, they said she didn’t seem desperate at all.
Another person wrote about drinking ginger ale at the natural history museum, then never responded again.
The Episodes
The interviews became a podcast series. Each episode includes quotes with recordings from the original interviews. They will be released every Monday for nine Mondays starting September 1st.
What This Is
The Lilly Friend Project is a podcast and digital experiment documenting what happened when someone decided to systematically approach friendship formation in New York City. It consists of recorded conversations with strangers about connection, loneliness, and how people find each other. It also now consists of a second questionnaire that will feed you into a Discord with other people who filled out the questionnaire. A new community?
Available wherever you listen to podcasts.