Avva - Lilly Friend Project

Preliminary Questions

1. Where do you live?

bushwick

2. Are you crazy?

Yes No

3. Do you want more friends?

internet friends in-person friends both

Open Questions

1. Why are you filling out this questionnaire?

This seems like the coolest project ever. i’m sort of mad i didn’t think of it first. I’m not ACTUALLY mad but moreso very impressed. I want to know it all. I hope i can make a new friend

2. How many "close friends" (by close friends I mean people that you see more than twice a month if they live in the tri-state area or if they are a long-distance friend that you speak with at least twice a month) do you have?

I have maybe one or two. I just moved back to nyc and a lot of my old friends live very far uptown. or we just don’t have common interests anymore. which is okay and i still love them deeply in my heart.

3. It's Saturday morning! What time are you up and what do you want to do with the day?

I’m probably awake at 10-11. I’m trying to wake up earlier but that’s fine with me for now. The whole day is mine, temporarily anyhow. I take a thorough shower (i love getting clean) and go to non profit yoga. I like the yoga place i go to because it’s donation based and i’m really poor currently. then i walk around for a few hours and daydream. Daydreaming is soooo important to me. I love fantasizing. I can do it forever freakishly long. I hit the grocery store and when im home, I probably shower again. THEN! i make a nice big lunch or dinner. Maybe get ready and go out to dance i dunno. I hope i’m not bad at this.

4. Do you like to go to any kind of cultural experiences? What kind and how often?

I immediately am thinking of culture in like, the broadest sense. Yes. I like bringing the culture to me when i cook though. I love cooking but i’m trying to become a master of every cuisine. It will take a lifetime but the time will pass anyhow i figure. Otherwise i try to do as many new things as possible outside. i struggle with agoraphobia so its important that i try new things that require me to go outside constantly. my next goal is pole classes. That’s a culture of its own i think.

5. How do you feel about Amy Winehouse?

may she rest in PEACEEEE i miss her. her style is so distinct and cool. and her voice is incredibly rich. she had such a kind smile. I like when you can tell how kind a person is based on their smile. surely she is the ultimate cool gal/ visionary.

6. "Uh oh! I'm experiencing a negative emotion"; what happens inside you? How do you deal with it?

To be frank, i struggle with panic attacks a lot. I’m trying to get better at managing them though. My thoughts tend to snowball and nothing makes sense or feels right to me. I immediately go to a very dark place when i experience negative emotions. But i’m learning that in order to avoid that i NEED to let myself feel them. It will get worse before it gets better.

7. How do you feel about school and teachers?

i like school. I didn’t always because of bullying and stuff but now that i’m older i look back with fondness. i really would like to go back to college. As for teachers, i went to Catholic/ Waldorf school so many of them were nuns. They were very kind actually. I respect people who can do the same thing over and over again. It’s crazy to me how teachers have to repeat the same lesson 5/6 times a day. Sounds like a nightmareeeee to meeeeeeee

8. What is the most meaningful way to spend time?

Laughing!!! and singing!! with friends!!! Or spending half the day in bed with a lover. It’s the closest thing to heaven. I love warmth and i love love.

9. What is your favorite law (if you do not have a favorite, what is one that you think of positively)?

Well!!! I used to live in Arizona, as well as Florida, and there are laws that protect animals when hunting. They are important for our environment and the ecosystem. For example, when catching lobster it has to be under a certain size (or over? i forget. I’ve only done it once). That’s the law i think of off the top of my head. I’m sure later i’ll be kicking myself when i recall another law that is cool. Sorry

10. What app on your phone (other than essentials) is your most used app?

tumblr or tiktok. I use tiktok as a search engine for cooking sometimes. like, the other day i made Swedish meatballs and i needed to know how much flour other people were using for the gravy. Plus i love a good joke here n there

11. What are you hoping to get from filling this out?

I guess i hope i learn something about myself. Often times it’s hard for me to sit and really think because i will become panicked, but that’s something i need to gain control of. And of course i would like a new friend! i hope so

Multiple-Choice Questions

1. If you had to choose one word to describe yourself, which one would you choose:

Scary Sporty Baby Ginger Posh

2. The worst month is:

January March July November I don't think about this way

3. Do you live to eat or eat to live?

Eat to live Live to eat I'm really not sure It's complicated.... 🙁 I'm uncomfortable by this question and prefer not to answer

4. How do you feel about August: Osage County:

Love that movie! Hate that play! I thought it was a moving and interesting depiction of the American family Merryl Streep was great(doi!) and I am indifferent/feel somewhat positive about it Don't know what that is

5. How often do you speak about your love life with your friends?

A lot Not that often Once every other time I feel it out and need to make sure I don't talk about it too much Everytime I see my best friends

6. Your biggest fear about getting older is:

Becoming irrelevant Running out of time My body falling apart Becoming boring I'm not afraid of getting older

7. Dogs wearing clothes are:

Adorable and necessary for their comfort Humiliating for the dog Fine for practical reasons only (rain, cold) A symptom of social rot Depends entirely on the dog's attitude about it

8. People who don't tip well:

Probably just don't understand how service industry works Are fundamentally bad people Might be going through something financially Should be banned from restaurants I don't judge people's tipping habits

9. Distance in relationships:

Is always a sign something is wrong Can actually strengthen the bond between people Should be avoided at all costs Is necessary for maintaining mystery Means someone isn't trying hard enough

10. The best way to end a text conversation is:

Just stop responding when it feels natural Say 'okay talk soon!' or similar Send a thumbs up emoji You don't end them, they just fade There is no good way

11. The phrase "it is what it is" is:

Zen wisdom Giving up disguised as acceptance Sometimes true, sometimes lazy The most annoying phrase in English Perfect for ending awkward conversations

12. When someone consistently disappoints you, you:

Keep giving them chances because that's what loyalty means Gradually distance yourself while remaining cordial Have a direct conversation about expectations Cut them off immediately - life's too short Use it as an opportunity to examine your own expectations

13. How do you feel about answering all these questions:

Annoyed - this was way too long Intrigued - I enjoyed thinking about these things Resentful - some of these felt invasive Excited to discuss my answers with someone Neutral - just another survey

14. If we met in person, what would you want to talk about first:

Something completely unrelated to this questionnaire Why you asked such weird questions The answers we disagreed on most Whatever comes up naturally in conversation I'd rather just see what happens

Essay Question

Please describe a friend breakup you have gone through. If you haven't gone through a friend breakup, please explain why you think you have never gone through a friend breakup. Outline a major friendship in your life and explain why it is successful.

My beautiful friend REDACTED and i are on the outs. I was completely crushed and defeated originally. However i have more perspective on the situation now. REDACTED and I have known each other since we were 15. I introduced her to my close family friend REDACTED two years ago. They’d started dating (?) but unofficially i guess. They left on fine terms but he did do her doggggg i can’t even lie. And that upset me deeply, but she didn’t want me to mention it to him. REDACTED is very close with my family as are his brothers. I see him often in passing, and because of this, REDACTED hasn’t spoken to me. I was absolutely crushed because i didn’t do anything wrong, and there is no way i can avoid seeing him because he comes to family gatherings and bbqs etc. What bothers me about this situation is that REDACTED isn’t just taking a break from me, she is actively sort of mean to me. In my opinion, i think it bothers her that REDACTED and i are close so she sort of villainizes me in her head. I can tell she thinks i’m an ungrateful and stuck up girl who gets opportunities handed to her which REALLYYYY bothers me because it simply is not the case. I fear that whenever i struggle she doesn’t take me seriously, even when we were friends. But i love her a lot and i want to make our friendship work…i hope we can get past this. Time will tell. Until then i just want her to find happiness with her situation.

My most successful relationship is with my friend REDACTED. She is a wonderful girl…. she’s non judgmental, gives excellent advice, and she’s so incredibly monotone. I just love her!!! We’ve become so close that i can see past her monotone voice. I feel like a REDACTED expert! Our relationship blossoms because we laugh a lot and we relate to one another on nearly every level. We were discussing this yesterday, on our 12 hour phone call. REDACTED feels seen by me and i feel seen by REDACTED. We never fight! I was even with her today when i found the “You are now my friend” card. We both took one. <3 thank you